I Have Mountains To Climb

I know that it has been a long time since I have written.  I really can't share all the reasons why, but I can say that currently I am climbing a mountain that I have never had to climb before and that I never imagined I would ever climb.  I felt like I couldn't find anything positive to say.  I have felt lost, sad, depressed and anxious. 
Anyone that reads me regularly, knows that I really do try to keep the positive going on my blog.  That is not to say that I don't have trials.  It is just that I have learned so much be trying to focus on the things in life that really are good.  That bring me up instead of pulling me down.  I have chosen to honor courage and strength through the trials. 
But, for a while now, I could not find courage and strength within myself.  I am still out here.  I read many of you daily.  I am working through this, and I do know Heavenly Father loves me.  I also understand just how hard  life can be.  I know that I will learn and grow from the trials, it is just that sometimes, I don't want to.   
I will keep writing, it might not be as often as before.  I am going to take it slow and easy and just start to find myself once again.  I listened to this wonderful talk in conference two weeks ago.  I found peace in the words and wanted to share a small measure with you.  I hope that it reminds you how very much you are Loved, that you have always been loved, and you will always be loved.

"If we have faith in Jesus Christ, the hardest as well as the easiest times in life can be a blessing. In all conditions, we can choose the right with the guidance of the Spirit. We have the gospel of Jesus Christ to shape and guide our lives if we choose it. And with prophets revealing to us our place in the plan of salvation, we can live with perfect hope and a feeling of peace. We never need to feel that we are alone or unloved in the Lord’s service, because we never are. We can feel the love of God. The Savior has promised angels on our left and our right, to bear us up. And He always keeps His word."


—President Henry B. Eyring, "Mountains to Climb", General Conference, Apr. 2012

May you feel the comfort of those angels bearing you up through your burdens is my prayer for you this day.

Sabbath Day Scribblings - Believe

“God is eagerly waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as he always has. But he can't if you don't pray, and he can't if you don't dream. In short, he can't if you don't believe.” ― Jeffrey R. Holland - 

Five Minute Friday - Trust

Around here I like to participate in an exercise called Five Minute Fridays. We write for five minutes flat. We write because we want to, not because we have to. We write for fun, for joy, for discovery.

On Fridays we just write without worrying if it’s just right or not. Won’t you join us?

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.

2. Link back to the Gypsy Mama and invite others to join in.

3. Please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them.

OK, are you ready? Give me your best five minutes on:

Trust…

START 

Hebrews 13:5  Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.

My life has been filled with too many dark things. I learned early that trust was not something to take for granted. I learned to do things by myself and for myself. I learned that I could depend on myself and not those around me. 

Time passed and I grew up. One of the hardest lessons in my life has been to learn to trust again. To learn that I do not need to carry all the burdens for myself, that I do not need to depend only on myself. I had to learn that there were those who could be trusted and would not let me down.

Trust is something that I still struggle with.  In those struggles, I have learned to trust the only One that really matters. I have learned to know that He is there.  That He loves me.  That He is mindful of me, and that He cares for my needs.  I have learned that He will be with me, not only in the good times, but also in the difficult ones.  That although He doesn't take away the trials, He can and will heal the pain.  

I have learned that even in the darkness, there is peace.    

STOP

Now it's your turn.  What can you write about trust in just five minutes?

Don't forget to join us over here with your words.  

Writer's Workshop - My Valentine

Today I am joining with Mama Kat for her weekly writer's workshop. The rules are simple:

Choose a prompt, post it on your blog, and go over to visit at Mama Kat's and add your name to the link list posted there. For good comment karma try to comment on the three blogs above your name!!

The Prompts:
1.) Who was at your front door?
2. Start with the phrase “Ten years ago on this day, I was…”
3. If you give a Mom a Blank…a post written in the style of the children’s “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie” books.
4. Without social media I…
5. A poem for your valentine.I chose to write a Valentine poem. 

To My Valentine

by Patricia A Pitterle

I loved to make sweet valentines

When I was just a little girl,

With red hearts cut in perfect lines

and ribbons long and curled.

I folded up the paper

And cut the halves just so,

Then opened up a perfect heart

The two halves made a whole.

I wanted life to be much like 

Those simple hearts I made

Where both sides would fit perfectly 

Together as I bade.

Yet life is not a paper heart

Cut evenly, I've learned

That each side will do as it will

No matter what I've yearned.

The edges fray and stretch and bend

Each one with different needs

And yet the middle meets and melds

Becoming one indeed.

And so at last I have let go

Of dreams of perfect lines

I choose to let the edges go

That two might be combined.

The edges aren't important

They don't define the pair

It's the fold right through the middle

That joins the other there.

Now two hearts beat together 

In strength and love divine

The two are meshed and solid

Withstanding the tests of time.

The middle of two hearts become

The place of love and care.

The perfect whole made from two halves

That found safe refuge there.

Not Good Enough

Today, actually everyday, I struggle with being enough.  With feeling like I make a difference.  With my need to matter.  It is so easy to look around and find my failures.  

• I don't keep the house as clean as I should.
• I don't dress up, actually, I dress comfortably 99% of the time.
• I take things personally, even when I don't want to.
• I yell at my children when I get frustrated.
• I don't trust my Heavenly Father enough.  
• I try and do too many things.
• I don't fix dinner every night.
• I would rather read than do my chores.
• I don't say, "I love you" often enough.
• I feel overwhelmed most of the time.  

And that is not even the tip of the iceberg of my faults.  Realistically though, I know that I am not alone.  I know that when I look at myself this way, I am in the business of comparing myself to the woman I think I should be.  The woman that criticizes me.  The woman who knows what I could be if I would only try a little harder and do a little better.  
I am only looking at half the picture of myself.  I am looking at what I could be if I were perfect.  I am looking at the goal without seeing the good things that surround me.  I am not looking at my own successes.  My own triumphs.  
I think that I am probably a lot like you.  We each see more of our faults than our good part.  We see more of the would'a, could'a, should'a that surrounds us, and we forget the half that is the  will, shall, and can.   Yet, that half is part of me too.

• It is easy for me to love.
• It is easy for me to take care of people.
• It is easy for me to worship.
• I have faith.
• I write poetry
• I have the ability to overlook the faults in others.
• I love to teach.
• I love to share.
• I love to write about my Heavenly Father.
• I cherish all things family in my heart.

And that is not the tip of that iceberg either.  There are many more things that I also do very well.  I think one of the biggest mistakes we make is to only share our faults and our failings we forget to share our triumphs and our joys.  
Maybe, just maybe, if we are brave, we will find out that parts of us truly are wonderful too.  So, my challenge to you today is to find ten things that you are good enough in.  Ten things that show who you are and what you do.  Ten things that are unique to you.  


Come on, try it.  You really are good enough!  

Sabbath Day Scribblings- If You Have Been Wronged

"If you feel you have been wronged—by anyone (a family member, a friend, another member of the Church, a Church leader, a business associate) or by anything (the death of a loved one, health problems, a financial reversal, abuse, addictions)—deal with the matter directly and with all the strength you have. “Hold on thy way” (D&C 122:9); giving up is not an option. And, without delay, turn to the Lord. Exercise all of the faith you have in Him. Let Him share your burden. Allow His grace to lighten your load. We are promised that we will “suffer no manner of afflictions, save it were swallowed up in the joy of Christ” (Alma 31:38). Never let an earthly circumstance disable you spiritually. "  Donald L. Hallstrom 

A Simple Moment - Teaching Others

This Moment

A single photo 

– no words –

capturing a moment from our lives.

A simple, special, extraordinary moment.

A moment

I want to pause, savor and remember.

A moment

that brings a smile to my lips, 

and joy to my heart.

Five Minute Friday - Real

Today is one of my favorite days.  It is a day when I relax, when I think, when I ponder and when I share.  I join with others and write without caring if it is "right" or not.  I just write, for the fun, for the adventure, for the joy of putting words on a page.  So, come on over to The Gypsy Mama, and join us for just five short minutes of wonder.  
The prompt today is:

REAL

START

I love the word Real.  It is an amazing word to me.  I can't even talk about it without including and excerpt from my all time favorite children's story, The Velveteen Rabbit.  

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

Real to me is really simply love in action.  It is giving something my all.  It is the way I feel about my family and my children.  It is the tears, the sorrow, the fighting, the messes, the laughter, Christmas morning under the tree, the hopes, the fears, the love that is all wrapped up into what family really means to me.  
Being real is when the people you love most of all, understand you and love you just how you are.  It is the ability to forgive each other, care for each other, and accept each other.  It is something that a family becomes, as they learn to put the needs and wants of others far above their own.  Being REAL is what makes my family exactly who I want to be with.  With all our craziness and chaos, we love each other, we need each other, we want to be with each other.  But the best part of all is that we are REAL with each other.  Home is a place where you can take your hat off, be yourself, and still be loved.  I am not sure that you can get anymore REAL than that.  
STOP


Now it's your turn.  Write about real and come over the The Gypsy Mama and join us.